My Coronadiary staged a protest this month. June 2020 was just way too much for it to chew. But now we’re coming out of it, so, to coincide with the 30^th and the imminent re-opening of London pubs, cinemas and barbers, here’s a breezy look back at things past and others yet to come. As the lunchtime news alerts me to new lockdown measures in Leicester, I’m wondering if barbers will be hanging up their clippers before they’ve had a chance to tackle their first Corona-fro. I don’t care; though my roots are in desperate need of tlc, I plan to barge my way into a big screen session of Chris Nolan’s latest film Tenet, after downing a pint in a newly-opened beer garden near me.

 This month we witnessed images of police brutality that will remain forever etched in the collective memory. George Floyd’s death rocked the world and spurred millions into action. […]

May 1

Another best friend’s birthday and we catch up via screen across time-zones.

 Isolation birthdays whizz by, calendar highlights ripped from time’s ledger.

 I return to my desk till 5pm, only popping out to make kids’ lunches, vacuum, do washing, empty dishwasher and tackle disturbing stains on the bathroom floor.

Evening: Gogglebox and sofa beckon.

May 2

 Why do Saturday mornings always end in bickering? The walls are closing in but the sun is shining on the tulips. 

Finally, I get around to a bit of eyebrow grooming for the first time in weeks. It’s all gone to pot. We play a family game of Psych! I wonder if Ellen DeGeneres has any idea how viciously it can be played. When in doubt, ‘gay porn’ is the all-purpose answer.

May 3

Sunday, grey skies in lockdown. Over it.

Beasties Boys Story and Haribo on the sofa. Go for a […]

April 1

This April Fool is not exactly tickety-boo. Snippets of world news trickle out of BBC Sounds as I lie on the sofa. World Bank forecast bleak. Virus creating panic in India. NSW, Australia forbids gatherings of more than two and will impose ‘hefty fines’ on those who break the law.

All night bizarre fever dreams see me pursued by a pangolin. I didn’t even give pangolins a second thought till the pandemic, but I should have! Is it possible to have a three-day headache? I have a burning feeling in my bones.

Over 500 dead in the UK… unspeakable.

Wimbledon cancelled. Tired of the chopping board.

Weary.

April 2

Dreamt I was on my way to the airport but had left all our passports at home. Did a wide arcing U-turn, neatly ejecting Jack from the side buggy of my motorised shopping […]